Achievement Lately

I've been thinking a lot about achievement lately.  Here I am binging on House of Cards, a Netflix series about politicians climbing their way up the administrative ladder, doing the exact opposite which is sitting on the couch.  The irony right??  I am being partially productive by multitasking.  There has been this pounding in my heart that I should write this particular book.  I've been avoiding it because I know it would be a daunting task.  There are so many intricacies because I know the story needs to be told so the same thing does not happen to another young woman out there. One of the reasons it has been weighing on me is because it was the most traumatic experience in my life.  It literally opened my eyes to the potential evils out there.  Most people who know me say that I'm strong.  I just think of any occurrence in my life could not be as nearly as awful as what I went through over 10 years ago.

The good news is that last night I wrote.  And when I wrote, I felt okay.  It wasn't awful.  This was extremely motivational.  I guess after years of self therapy and prayer that I am actually over it.  But then why write a book?  I sincerely believe this story will put things into perspective.  I am not not unlike many people out there in the world.  I was a young girl who was influenced by a man with a big dream.  What is also really great great about the story is that this influential man was arrested over a year ago for grand larceny, just to add to the pot.

It's just time.  I've written draft after draft over the years and I know that it will be a great addition to the literary world.  It's the story I was meant to write.  They say if God keeps telling you to do something then you should do it and the more time I put off, the more guilty I feel.

Yep, gotta do it.  Now if I could just figure out how to finish watching House of Cards and get back to being productive.

You're going to rue the day... You started my dream

I’ll be completely transparent, I was let go from my 9-5 job on Monday. Most people would think I would be distraught with thoughts going through my head like, “Oh, no! What am I going to do?” or “I can’t believe this horrible b**ch let me go. She’s going to rue the day she made that decision!” But no, that’s not how I feel at all. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.

You see, prayer is a very powerful thing, as much as some people might choose to believe or not to believe. I wrote a blog post a few weeks ago and I got a lot of praise from it after I prayed to God about my path the night before. I was a bad Christian and I hadn’t prayed in a while until Monday morning when I simply said, “Let me know where my path to living a dream will take me”. And boom! I was let go. It was apparent that the relationship was not working out the way anyone had anticipated, however, I used the job as an excuse to not fully pursue my passion for writing as much as I should have.

I had been dreaming of just writing since I was a little girl. I wanted to be a journalist, or so I thought, until I realized that would mean I would write someone else’s stories in a specific format for the rest of my life. I didn’t want to do that. I wanted to write my own stories. I wanted to be an investigative journalist but I wasn’t willing to work from the bottom of the barrel to hopefully make it to the top so I just did what society told me to do and got a job. I really deviated from my dream to write.

It wasn’t until 2011, I had my heart broken, and I went back to my roots. I was told I had talent and I remembered my purpose once again. I guess you have to hit some sort of rock bottom to remember where you came from. It wasn’t a real rock bottom, that came a few years later but it got me back to doing something I really enjoyed. Then the story just unfolded from that point. I started doing freelance work to expand my portfolio and here I am today, jobless and pursuing my real passion.

I have to say, this could not happen without the support of the Comedian who has always instilled in our relationship that to create is what makes us such a unique couple and I am reminded by him regularly to live our passion and our dream. I guess I am still living in a little bit of fear of the unknown. It’s interesting I read an article today in Addicted2Success.com basically solidifying what I have been avoiding for so long, the fear of the unknown. I’m not going to say I love or hated my job, it was just not me. Going in from 9-5, living someone else’s dream and passion, and going home a paycheck in which someone else chose the amount I was paid. Just the thought of all of that irks me a little bit. I’m not knocking it for anyone else, I’m just saying, it is not for me.

All in all, I’m excited for this journey I am just embarking on and every bone in my body is happy. Just utterly happy. I know it’s all in God’s hands now but I have faith that everything will turn out just the way it’s supposed to.

Lovenote images - Artistic images

The Freelance Struggle

Recently, I have ventured into the world of freelancing. After listening to several podcasts and reading articles, I went against the advice of most and tried a freelancing website. If you're trying to branch out into being paid for your art, this is definitely not the route.

After a week or two of being on the site, I could see why it was such a challenge to make a living. No one getting paid the rates listed could really make ends of me. But still, I was excited to have my first paying gig. Write 30 articles about dating advice. Easy enough considering that is one of my fortes. After I accepted the offer, I realized, I was literally being paid $1.00 per article. What a rip off! I know my content is worth so much more.

I really tried to make a good impression as this was my first job on the site but it just didn't seem worth it in the long run. The person who hired me said my content was amazing. Knowing that, I felt it was time to just quit. I could do so much more with the content I am able to produce on my own site and be truly appreciated by those I cater to.

I am venturing out on doing some real freelance work. I have started a new website catering to that customer. If you're interested in seeing some samples, feel free to visit Valerie Writes.

I would love to make my travel dreams come true. I know it can only be obtained by not working the hum drum 9-5 where I have to ask to have 3 weeks of vacation a year and the company dictates how much I'm worth. Maybe I sound like a true Millenial but at the end of the day. That's how I really feel.

The Road to Self Discovery

I finally did it. I figured out what I wanted to be when I grew up. It has been a struggle in many avenues of my life during the beginning of the year, however, I found that I stepped on this road to finding out what I really wanted and how to really express myself. For those who know me, I'm not necessarily the best at expressing myself verbally but when it comes to pen and paper, I am fluent in emotion. I think the current relationship I'm in has opened my eyes in who I am as a person in a relationship. I look back in all of my experiences and I find that I really needed someone to invest in me, the person I am.I'm stubborn, I really don't know how I feel until 20 minutes later, and I stutter when I'm angry. It's a bit astonishing because I recall some past relationships where I used to fight all of time when I'm not an aggressive person. I think some people just know how to push your buttons. I tend to be a really patient person so a lot of things don't bother me. I really don't like those who are inconsiderate and always try to find the easiest way out. Maybe I can be a little hard, but my business upbringing wasn't exactly a walk in the park. I have a little birdie in my head that always says, "Don't do something if you're going to do it half ass." I tend to want to be as hard on people as I am myself and I have to remember, they are not me. So relax! I know you're sitting there wondering, "Alright already! What do you want to be when you grow up?" Fine, I'll tell you! I want to be a Corporate Trainer and do training development. I really have a passion for teaching people and I would get to integrate writing in the process... boom! Now, I know you're thinking, why don't you just be a teacher? In all honesty, I'm not a kids person. I love the ones in my life, but dealing with other kids and their potentially bad upbringing. I don't have the patience for it. I do, however, want to commend the teachers that do and love their job. Thank you for molding the future. I look forward to this journey. See you at the finish line!

The Urge to Write

It's been a couple of weeks since I last wrote in my infamous blog.  I've had a bit of writer's block, as they say.  Since moving in with the Comedian, I've been coincidentally crazy at work, then I go home and it seems there is something to do or someone to see.  I tell you, it's been non stop.  I yearn for the days when I turn to the Comedian, he looks at me and asks, "So what do you want to do today?"  Lately, it's been, "Babe, what do we have scheduled for the weekend?" I have calmed down immensely from my crazy college days.  I think it was a progression.  When I found my group of friends from Orlando, they were just as crazy as I was.  It was a match made in party heaven, however, they are settling down a little bit as well.  There are babies and pregnancies popping up all over the place.  My co workers consistently tell me, I'm next.  I look at them and say, "Not yet, I haven't been drinking the water."

Lately, I've immersed myself in listening to podcasts like crazy.  Honestly, the Comedian got me into them.  It started off listening to his favorite comedian, Bill Burr, and it grew to bloggers like Pat Flynn and my new favorite, Entrepreneurs on Fire.  It has my mind going a mile a minute on what plans I might for my future.  Don't get me wrong, I love to write, I just want that to be what propels me to what I am destined to do.

I know deep down inside, this is only the beginning.  I know in a few years, this blog will have a new meaning and great following.

Thank you all for reading!