Caller Smart - The app that will block catfishing

Have you ever wondered how to prevent potential Catfishing or ending up in a situation like my friend from one of my previous blogs, What's your last name again?   Well, guess what?  There's an app for that! Katie from Caller Smart reached out to me to spread the word on how their app can help eliminate the possibility of having the wool pulled over your eyes.  It can happen to anyone.  Imagine being at a bar and you exchange phone numbers with a guy that has just made you giggle for the last half an hour.  What if you can look up his phone number to solidify that he is actually who he says he is.  Not only that, but there is a forum on Caller Smart  where other gals can put comments about that particular person under their phone number.  Just another saving grace that will keep you from dating someone who potentially just want to get into your pants.

Katie Boudreau from Caller Smart explained during our interview that the app is a community phone book that is free and available on the iTunes store.  There are additional services such as background checks that cost a little extra through a 3rd party site.  What you do is look up a phone number and check out whether there are any comments regarding the person in question.  This also works for telephone scams.  When did it become okay for telemarketers to call our cell phones??  You can leave feedback on the number as well letting the world know how awful of a tipper the guy was or whether he was just scamming to get into your panties.  The comments are monitored so keep the raunchy language at home.

Katie said that privacy is taken very seriously and you can only search by phone number not by name.  What was also really interesting is that there are scammers out there who target those in their silver years.  It reminds me of the days I was a telemarketer myself and sold credit cards to my elders. (sigh... college jobs but the past is the past) There are people out there who claim to fall in love with those who are older and alone.  Then they convince them to send them money.  That's sooo awful!

Keep yourself safe and those you love safer from scams, deuchebags, and just really really bad people.  Download the Caller Smart app from the iTunes store or check out their website at CallerSmart.com.

Is Rejection Worth the Risk?

bar-scene-07

I realized I haven’t posted in a while—but I promise to add new content more regularly this coming year. I’ll be starting my MBA in January, but you know what? Challenge accepted.

For whatever reason, I find it fascinating when the Comedian gives dating advice to his younger cousins. It’s not that what he says isn’t valid—it’s that it all makes complete sense. It’s like a window into the male brain. Since we met online, he never had to hit on me at a bar or throw out some cringey pickup line. But hearing his perspective still gives me a deeper understanding of the dating world from the other side.

I’ve spent years being single, dating, observing, laughing (sometimes crying) through it all—and I’ve definitely formed my own theories. For example: I’ve learned to smile when I want someone to come over. To laugh at their jokes (even if they’re bad). And I’ve come to admire what men deal with when it comes to rejection. Society often expects them to take charge, to initiate, to risk the “no.” Women have gotten bolder over the years—thankfully—but I’ll admit: when I’ve taken the lead, I’ve sometimes felt out of place. Too forward. Too masculine.

And let’s be honest: when I’ve approached a guy, about 75% of the time, I’ve been rejected. But when someone approaches me? There’s a 90% success rate for at least a decent conversation.

Now, I’m not saying don’t shoot your shot—by all means, do what works for you. I’ve just learned that for me, it’s more effective to make space for the connection to happen rather than force it. I also try to make the conversation about the other person, not me. The more I know about someone, the easier it is to see if we’re aligned. But again—that’s what works for me.

I said something the other day that felt like the most “me” metaphor possible:

“Dating is like math—there are different ways to get to the answer, but all that matters is you have the correct answer in the end.”

No matter who you are, there’s always a risk of rejection. But don’t let that stop you. There really are plenty of fish in the sea. And if someone doesn’t feel it, that just means they’re not your person.

My best friend once told me something I’ll never forget:

“If he doesn’t get your jokes, he’s not for you.”

And she was right. I have a unique sense of humor—equal parts dry, nerdy, and corny. I needed someone who would laugh with me or at least laugh because I’m laughing. Thankfully, the Comedian gets my jokes. Or at least pretends to, which is almost better.

So here’s my point: if you never take the chance, you’ll never know the outcome. Go for it. Risk the “no.” Because the worst that could happen? She says it. And you go on with your day. But the best that could happen? You find someone who laughs at your jokes—and gets you.

And that’s always worth the risk.