Hey Guys! This Is Tom: When Introducing Someone You're Dating Goes Awkwardly Wrong

I don’t know if I’m the only one who gets a surge of anxiety when introducing someone I’m dating to my friends — but it hits me every single time. Most of my friends think I’m dramatic for putting so much pressure on that moment, but I can’t help it. I genuinely care about everyone’s well-being and want harmony across the board.

Since I’ve never been especially close with my family, my friends are everything — they fill those emotional gaps and are often the first people I turn to when I need support. So yes, getting their stamp of approval on someone I’m seeing is super duper important.

A few months ago, a friend I used to date insisted on coming to visit me. I was hesitant — most of our conversations end in arguments — but because I’m annoyingly nice, I said yes. Coincidentally, one of my friends was having a birthday dinner that same weekend, and I didn’t want to miss it. So, I figured I’d just bring him along. Spoiler alert: I should’ve gone solo.

I picked him up from the train station. He practically leapt on me, and right then, I realized… OMG. I am so not into him like I used to be. I panicked a little inside but played it cool. I dropped him off at my apartment so I could finish up at work.

When I got back, he tried to kiss me again. Nope. I pushed him away gently, and we got ready for dinner. What I had forgotten — and this becomes important — is that he can’t hear out of one ear.

At the restaurant, I greeted everyone and waited for my best girlfriend, her husband, and another good friend to show up. Now, let me explain something: my best friend’s husband is very protective of me — think big brother vibes. When I introduce him to someone I’m dating, he usually doesn’t say much until he sees if they’re going to stick around. Smart man.

So we sit down… and “Tom” won’t stop talking. Like, at all. My friends try to ask him questions, but because of his hearing issue, he doesn’t catch them. Cue the awkward silence and confused glances.

I could feel the secondhand embarrassment radiating off my friends. I knew right then: I wasn’t going to live this night down. And spoiler again: I haven’t.

I’ll spare you the details of the rest of the night, but let’s just say I wasn’t exactly the kindest version of myself. It’s like my embarrassment turned into petty coldness. Not my proudest moment, but hey — sometimes your gut reaction is your loudest truth.

After that weekend, I made a new rule for myself: not everyone you’re dating needs to meet your friends right away. Sometimes, it’s better to give things time before merging worlds. If a guy’s not someone I can confidently bring around without stress, I’ll gladly sacrifice a couple nights out to avoid reliving The Tom Situation.