Men in Uniform: A Personal Obsession or Something Deeper?

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I don’t know if it stems from the fact that my dad was in the Army—or if it's something deeper—but I’ve always been drawn to men in uniform. Someone once told me, “You date what you know,” and maybe there's truth to that. There’s just something about the combination of structure, purpose, and masculinity that makes my heart skip a beat.

According to psychologist and relationship expert Dr. Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D.,

“The ‘uniform’ may signify that the man is able to manage life’s troubles… It spells safety and security.”

And honestly? That checks out.

Military, Firefighters, Police—Oh My

I’ve dated men from every branch of the military—yes, all of them—as well as a firefighter and a policeman. I use the word dated loosely here (some were one or two dates, others stuck around a little longer). But this post isn’t about the individual relationships. This is about the magnetic pull of the uniform itself.

That commanding presence. The air of responsibility. The strength—both physical and emotional.
It all adds up to a kind of safety net, especially for women who are used to being the strong ones.

The Unspoken Cost of That Lifestyle

That said, the lifestyle isn’t easy.

I was once engaged to someone who served in Afghanistan. And let me tell you, the daily worry is like emotional torture. The thought that a single missed call could mean something terrible… it’s not for the faint of heart. I have so much respect for the men and women who stay strong while their partners are overseas. They carry the emotional weight of both protector and nurturer, often alone, so their loved ones can protect our country.

So in the spirit of Memorial Day: thank you for your service. I mean that deeply.

Why Are We So Drawn to Uniforms?

Is it the promise of protection? The structure? The discipline?
Or maybe, deep down, it’s the fantasy that someone can rescue us—even if we’re strong enough to handle it on our own.

As much as I hate admitting I need saving…
Wouldn’t it be nice to have someone who could, just in case? 😊